Philly: The Good, the Bad, and the Ugly

Transitions are never easy for me. Moving is a prime example. Given the number of times I have moved in my life, I adjust pretty well overall, but I am prone to frequent breakdowns, particularly in the first few weeks in a new place.

Though I've been excited for months about moving here, I've also been nervous. I come from a town of less than 3,000 and a county of less than 30,000, and though I've lived in a few mid-sized cities, I now live in the sixth most populous city in the US. Close to six million people, in fact. I love city life, but it has been a slow adjustment over the years for little old me from a little town in Georgia to get used to big places and so many people.

About a week after we got here, I totally had a meltdown. Our apartment was still in a state of complete and total chaos, and anyone who knows me knows that I absolutely need order, so this was not good for me. We had no idea how to get anywhere, and even the simplest tasks--like getting a gallon of milk--seemed so difficult and complicated. Our GPS led us astray more than once, but with no Internet and no phone book, we were forced to rely upon it. My frustration, exhaustion, and feelings of being completely overwhelmed peaked on our way back from New Jersey when we accidentally drove through the E-Z Pass lane on the toll bridge and then got lost on the way home. I decided we never should have moved here and had an all-out sobfest, followed by a completely unfair game of blaming Dan for talking me into coming here (which, in fact, he did not). I was sure that it would never feel like home here, and I just wanted to leave.

But, as always happens, it's gotten easier. Later that week, Dan and I finally had a chance to venture out in the daylight (Dan always got home from work after dark, so we didn't really have a chance to explore during daytime hours until we finally had a weekend). We visited the local library and got pizza from a place around the corner. We found a local market less than a mile away that sells local, organic eggs and milk--two things I always had trouble tracking down anywhere near my home in St. Louis. And, believe it or not, one of the biggest comforts for me was finally figuring out where to drop off our recycling and pick up our recycling bin! Something about that made me feel like maybe it could feel like home here. . . a little silly, I know, but I was blissfully happy to have that bin.

Life is finally starting to feel normal here, and our apartment finally feels like home. It will take me forever to figure this city out and learn my way around, but I can now comfortably make my way to lots of places without any nerves, and Dan and I are slowly making our way out to explore (this will be easier when it finally warms up!).

Here's what I've already learned to love--and what I don't love so much--about this new place I call home.

The Good

• I still can't get over my excitement at living in a place with so much history. I can't wait to make my way back to Old City and take it in all over again.

• We actually know people around here! Dan and I have had an opportunity to catch up with several old friends and many of Dan's family members. This is a huge contrast to our experience in the Midwest.

• Philly pretzels. I have hardly ever seen Dan so happy as when he finally had a chance to take a bite of a true Philly soft pretzel, spicy mustard and all. We were even lucky enough to arrive just as they were cooking up a fresh batch!
  

• Philadelphia is, without a doubt, a city of neighborhoods. I love that sense of community and learning about the character of each new place (though, on the down side, I wonder how long I will it will be before I'm considered a true Philadelphian--probably 40 years! At least Dan was born here, and his family is from here, so we get a little more cred).

• NYC and DC are only a short trian ride away!

• There seems to be an abundance of vegetarian food here. We've already started a list of places we are waiting to try; again, a nice contrast to other places I've lived, where I've been lucky if I can track down more than two places that specialize in vegetarian fare (and forget finding a place that's vegan). We had our first veggie cheesesteaks a couple of weeks ago--mmmm!

• The snow. We've already had enough of it that I can understand why folks tire of it, but to me, it's still so exciting and beautiful.

• IKEA! I'm sorry, I still can't get over it.
  

• There is just so much here! Restaurants, theater, museums, music, activities. . . we'll never see or explore it all. It's nice to know there will always be an abundance of new things out there to try.

The Bad

• Toll roads. We haven't encountered many of them, and we certainly don't have to drive on any regularly, but I still have not gotten accustomed to having to pay just to use a street.

• The taxes. I'm sure they're no different than any other major city, but still, it hurts.
  

• The traffic. This is the only thing that has always made me hesitant about living in or visiting big cities. I still avoid driving around rush hour. Luckily, there is decent public transportation here. Dan is able to take the train to work every day, and I'm hoping I'll be able to do the same when I finally have a job!

• The sports mania. I don't mind so much that people care about sports (even though I'm not a huge fan myself), but I don't know if I'll ever get used to how unforgiving people can be. Is it really necessary to boo and throw things? Really?

• Getting my driver's license and car tags was a bit of an odyssey. I'll spare you the stories, but let me just say that a) you have to present a certified birth certificate with a raised seal just to get a driver's license, b) you can't get your license and tags at the same place, and it's nearly impossible to figure out where you're supposed to go and c) the Department of Transportation's website is confusing and completely unhelpful.
  

The Ugly

• The state has a ridiculous grip on alcohol around here. You have to buy all of your wine and liquor at state-operated stores. Many restaurants here are BYOB because it's too expensive or troublesome to get a liquor license. This is all annoying, but here is the real killer. . . you cannot buy beer at the state-operated stores. You also cannot buy it at grocery stores, gas stations or any other normal place. Your only options are to a) buy a full case of beer at a beer distribution store or b) buy your beer from a bar. Yep, you have to actually go to a damn bar if you want a six-pack of beer and buy it from a cooler in the back. This is probably not such a big deal if you know where to go, but I don't just want to walk into a random bar without knowing anything about their selections. . . what if all they have to offer is Miller Lite? Plus, if the bars are smart, I'm sure the beer is ridiculously expensive. Good thing I love wine.
  

All in all, though, things are going well. When Dan and I moved, we tried to pick a place where we hoped we could stay long-term. Of course, you never know where life will take you, but despite the drama of the first few weeks, I'm starting to think that building a life here will work out just fine (and a little less beer is probably good for me).